Decembers in my family were a time when any Christmas spirit was overwhelmed with drama, trauma. I had no idea how to beat the Christmas Blues. My apprehension would start to build sometime in November. My Mother, who was diagnosed as Bipolar, was dysfunctional at best, had Narcissistic, Alcoholic and Suicidal tendencies, and was hospitalized in a psychiatric institution one Christmas season when I was young. Another year my friend Jeff killed himself, two days before his birthday – in December!
(Note I am purposely NOT using the term ‘Committed Suicide’ as I have come to understand that refers to suicide having been illegal and stigmatized, neither of which is helpful for the person considering suicide, nor their loved ones. What is needed instead is compassion, support, addressing and resolving the root causes of why one would consider killing themselves.)
When my parents finally separated, the festivities didn’t get any easier as I felt the stress of having to be in two places. Some years I went to a friend’s place for XMAS and just avoided my whole family scene, (but felt guilty about it.) To top it off when my father was slowly dying, both Mom and my dog, Skaha, died within three days of each other – between Xmas and on New Years Eve! The combination of all these events, and many others, led to my not being able to enjoy Christmas or much else of my life.
After the deaths of my parents, I found EFT Tapping!
It took several Emotional Freedom Techniques, (EFT Tapping) sessions before I noticed that I finally felt quite neutral about Decembers and could even get a little into the holiday spirit, enjoy the parties and feel fine! Now I catch myself even looking forward to it! While I love listening and dancing to blues music, I particularly enjoy no longer feeling the Anxious Christmas Blues!
Frequently, folks have looked forward to family functions only to be disappointed as fights erupted, or angry, belittling words were spoken. These leave an emotional legacy that lasts for months, years or decades. During gatherings with family members, we get reminded of past relationship difficulties as toxic, dysfunctional behaviours
like guilt trips often rear their ugly heads again. Then there is the huge to-do-list that overwhelmed my mother and many others. And finally, there can be huge financial problems as people overspend to express love, gratitude or feelings of obligation!!!
Memories of sad or anxious times are not always confined to the Christmas period but can also occur as the anniversaries of the births or deaths of loved one’s approaches. It is a double whammy if those events happened during a significant time in your life, like your own birthday.
Despair no more!
Taking the time to tap on the negative feelings that ‘special moments’ can bring up; tapping on the difficult or unhealed memories of those relationships, will help you remove the sting from those significant events. Tapping
on any triggered feelings that resurface will allow you to notice and reframe those events, allowing you to be gentle with yourself during the anniversaries of a suicide or a rejection or any other significantly difficult times. And above all, remember to tap and breathe, before and during family gatherings, whether for holidays, weddings or funerals!
Do you feel stressed about Christmas?
Are you plagued by the ghosts of Christmas past with memories of drunken, angry or otherwise dysfuncitonal family gatherings that cause you anxiety?
Does the memory of lost loved ones make you feel blue?
Tapping on these feelings will have you end up feeling fine, or even fabulous, as you release and reframe the past!
Almost all of us have some difficult anniversaries, whether it be of the deaths of loved ones, breakups, rejections…. Consider setting up some EFT Tapping support for yourself, BEFORE the Christmas Blues set in, before the anniversary, or the holiday! While it’s true that tapping won’t bring back loved ones, it can leave us with more peaceful thoughts and feelings about them and their passing.
There is no reason to continue to suffer, year after year after year. It’s over, so let it be over. Tap it away, release it, and reframe it with Matrix Reimprinting.
If the Christmas season continues to be stressful and blue for you, I would be honoured to help you to reframe those memories from your past so that you can feel free to create happier ones this year.
If you too have used EFT Tapping to help you get over YOUR Christmas Blues, I would love to hear about how tapping has helped you.
While I am enjoying both sun and sea in Melaque, Mexico this winter, (and looking forward to a visit from friends over Solstice and Christmas), I am also available for sessions via Zoom, Skype, phone…
Contact me by email: alice@tappingdetective, if you wish to set up a date.
(If you prefer to call, the best number to reach me from Canada and the US is 011 521 315 108 4472
In some instances you may have to put a + sign in before the 52.)