When the rest of the world SEEMS to be joyfully anticipating the holiday gatherings, in some families there is the anticipation of the fights, criticisms, or violence. Then there are all the temptations in the way of those of us who are trying to eat only healthy foods and drinks.
Many of us experience increased grief about loved lives lost, or find ourselves saddened by the memories of being ignored, or unheard, by those who are ‘supposed’ to love us.
I am reminded of the times my mother self ‘committed’ into psychiatric hospitals around Christmas, because of all of my grandmother’s expectations of exactly how things should be done. December is the anniversary of my Mom’s death, followed a few days later by my dog, Skaha, on NYE. The suicide of a friend followed the next December, shortly after his birthday.
Interestingly, I find myself no longer dreading the end of the year. Thanks to EFT Tapping, I feel better equipped to deal with whatever comes up even though this December has sent me some challenges.
Two friends have left the planet. Our beloved elderly canine, Dharma has been very ill, and my partner Michael had Dengue. Carb-oholic than I am, I have been attempting the Keto diet. Throughout it all I have been tapping which seems to not only be helping me but those around me too. Michael has recovered, Dharma is doing much better and I am surviving without pasta, potatoes and rice!
I can’t think of a better time to encourage any of you who also struggle with Decembers, for whatever reasons, to tap frequently, (particularly before heading out to family gatherings, office parties or any other typically stressful event.)
Tapping Tips for Holiday Stress
So many folks tell me that they have difficulty deciding what to tap on when we are not tapping together. It needn’t be too complicated, (or perfect), in order to get some significant results.
Close your eyes and ask yourself: what AM I feeling?
∙If it is grief, then find a private, safe place and tap on your sadness, (while taking some deep breaths) and let the tears and sounds come.
∙If it is overwhelm or anxiety, take a break, go for a walk around the block and tap on feeling overwhelmed and/or anxious.
∙If it is irritation, because Uncle Joe insists of telling sexist and racist ‘jokes’, lock yourself in the bathroom and tap on how irritating your cousin, your younger brother, your older sister, your father is…., while remembering to focus on your breath. Alternatively, while slowing down your inhales and exhales, you tap gently, and surreptitiously, on your finger tips under the table.
∙If it is fear, in anticipation of predictably acrimonious meals, you can do some anticipatory tapping. “Even though I really don’t want to go, I hate going, I despise cousin Phil…,” tap on whatever you are thinking and feeling – emotionally and physically. Then check in with your body and your feelings after a round or two. Typically people report feeling calmer and more relaxed within a few minutes and more able to briefly tolerate the hard to tolerate.
Consider giving yourself permission to NOT go out to a scheduled festivity, if the thought of going makes your stomach ache. Say you are not feeling well, (which is true), and treat yourself to a favourite meal and movie, either by yourself or with someone more relaxing and fun to be around.
Happy Solstice! A great time to treat YOURSELF.
Book a massage; buy yourself something that YOU really like, or have always wanted.
Give yourself permission to spend time reminiscing about the good times in the past, (even if they feel few and far between). Focus your attention on anything, everything and anyone you have to be grateful for.
Be thankful that December only comes once a year!
Rest, reflect and intend. Go to bed early, perhaps with a good book, or an encouraging podcast, turn off the alarm and sleep in. Wake up refreshed, ready to compose an intention of what you would like to bring to your life.
Here’s to 2020!
May the coming year encourage more and more of us to find the support we need to heal, and to help others to heal by our example and encouragement.
If you are struggling with overwhelm, or anxiety, grief or resentment…
I would be honoured to help you to get through this season relatively unscathed. I am in Mexico and have, (fairly reliable) internet. There is NO NEED to suffer anymore.